Protecting & Strengthening Your Sensitivity

If you were ever labeled “sensitive”, “emotional”, “cry-baby”, etc. then this blog post is for you! If you’re irritated with people like this in your life, you should also take a chance and read this too, so you can better comprehend (even if you choose to distance yourself from them in the end! Wisdom never hurts.)

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Sometimes it feels like this topic gets beaten over the head, and there’s always this frustration around sensitivity. I guess that’s probably why there are so many articles out there now. Truth is, I don’t care how many times I have to talk about it, or how people choose to see it, because everyone needs guidance at some point in their life, and sometimes an article makes the world of a difference. The articles I have read changed the feelings of worthlessness and inherent wrongness, to acceptance of myself, simply because I was able to connect with somebody that inner-stood! And I have found that even if I can’t always find an article to relate, just one can change the way I see and utilize my inner-strength. That one moment of support helped me achieve a much more independent state of self-validation, which is ultimately the goal.

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It made a world of a difference, so I want to offer the same to someone that might feel this way too. Some people need to distract themselves to feel better. Others just need to talk or feel heard and seen. We all have different emotional needs! That’s the beauty of this life.

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But when others are irritated with your emotional expression, and choose to shame and punish you for it, it is easy to fall into unhealthy patterns of repression and anger. I personally experienced that and had to fight off the urge to do what they did and fall back into old patterns when people treat me that way.

But today, I have learned to pause, retreat, review and respond. And sometimes, no response is the best response. Not everything is personal, no matter how much it may look personal. It’s a hard lesson to learn and accept, but people’s judgments and intolerances are connected to their personal worlds and wounds. Learning that and accepting that people can sometimes utilize that counterintuitive practice has helped me to let go of judgments that don’t relate to me. My sensitive nature can be strengthened, if only I choose to see it that way and work toward it. And how people feel about it is NONE OF MY BUSINESS.

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Your sensitivity is your divinity.

Imani Cohen, The Hood Healer

“I don’t like the feeling around my emotional needs being judged” is no longer a viable reason for shutting down or doing what others think is best for me anymore. On the contrary, it is SUPER important to talk about these things with people that see you, or simply with yourself. That flow in communication is what makes its effects less painful, and it is through conversation that knowledge becomes wisdom.

But finding a listening ear, paired with compassionate honesty is like finding a rare gemstone, especially with how sensitivity can be portrayed these days. You’re seen as a burden, annoying, or even oblivious; and while you might manifest some negative traits here and there, you’re neither a burden nor annoying just for being yourself. You are growing! Growth is awkward and sometimes not the most appealing to the eye or heart. But you can be corrected and you can grow through that! You’re just around the wrong people. Tons of weight was dropped this year for myself and everyone around me, when I stopped emotionally dumping and questioned myself.

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“Why do I keep looking for emotional validation outside of myself?”

Even if necessary, it was truly so painful answering that question I didn’t like the idea of being alone with my feelings, mostly because I didn’t know what to do with them.

So I learned the comfort of my own presence. The greatest gift you can give yourself is your friendship.

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When we lose loved ones or become distant, it is devastating because losses can be unexpected and shocking, and some can be based around misunderstandings, too. In the past, I would immediately work to patch it up and work through the awkward energy. But today, I pause and think about the person before me. Maybe they aren’t in a good space, or I do not belong in close proximity anymore. Everyone is entitled to boundaries. But more importantly, some people may not know how to help you through those moments. I have learned to respect them and flow through the changes. I don’t feel that it’s my place to pretend I am okay at the cost of myself, for the benefit of the “status quo” anymore, so I don’t deny myself my emotions. However, I allow changes in my relationships, because people evolve and deserve that grace. Taking care of my reactions and emotions creates space for a variation of relationships to blossom. It may not be what I envision at all times, but it is what we ALL need, so that is what matters to me. No one should be forced to support you, if they don’t have the tools to help.

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So this year, after reflecting on the constant emotional rejection and social pressures of being less sensitive, I reached out to a friend of mine that I knew would have a deeper and more compassionate perspective, from personal experience. I knew we would softly discuss my own irritation with bothering myself and other people with my sensitivity. It saddened me to know that my emotional self caused irritation to people (and myself) at my most vulnerable moments at times. But I am learning to let that go. No one cares like I do at times. And guess what? That is who I am. No one else experiences my emotions for me, besides me! So why do others have to tell me it’s okay? I have the ability to feel SO DEEPLY. But it doesn’t have to be scary. Remember that emotions are so fleeting.

Even if there is always a desire from others to justify the constant desire to change my nature, rather than a desire to nurture and understand it, I refuse to go against my nature and my superpower. I have learned to practice drawing the line on my reactions instead. I experience emotions, but it is up to me how they affect me.

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“My emotions cannot hurt me.”

Jelissa Lebron

Everyone can benefit from a sensitive person in their group, but not everyone has the patience or compassion skills for the mistakes they will make along the way. But that drove me to find ways to change my perspective and drop that unnecessary weight within myself!

Your sensitivity is your superpower! But that comes with a huge responsibility: harness your power and know when to use it.

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It’s hard not to feel alone, embarrassed, rejected, and mocked for being yourself, all while learning your gifts. Especially when you have felt that way your whole life. Not everyone will understand. Learn to be okay with that, and you will find a different kind of peace. This world is full of paradoxes and painful reminders of our shortcomings. Choose to see the better side of it too. You need to find your balance. Being an empath or a sensitive person can be challenging. Embrace it anyway!

Duality, like a double edged sword, takes practice in handling. If you focus on only one side, the sweetness, then the other side, the bitterness, cuts deep. Too much of either one is poison. Balance will be your greatest tool of protection! You are capable. Trust yourself to walk through the trenches, while remembering that the light will follow soon.

Love forever,

Daniposa 🤍

Sick and Tired

I found out I was sick and I was a mess that day! I had lost my sense of smell the night before (Sunday, the 21st of February) and I had an internal mini panic attack because I just knew I would test positive for COVID-19.

That next day, a rapid test confirmed my fear to be true. I cried the entire day, and fell into a quick spiral of fear and sadness, triggered by the memories of my own experiences with losing a loved one to the virus. But I thank God for my beautiful family and tribe for nursing me back to health during one of my most vulnerable moments. My parents cooked and brought soups and essentials to help strengthen me. My sisters showered me with teas, natural remedies, and supplements that literally built up my nervous and immune systems. And my brothers kept me hydrated and snacked up so I would be strong. I didn’t expect the outpour of love and covering that I received, but I am humbled and grateful forever. I don’t believe I would have recovered as quickly or as well as I did without my people. It was all of their support that brought me back to health so quickly.

I’m on day 8 of my quarantine and feel 90% back to myself. My personal experience with the virus was like a really bad sinus and body cold. I had such a terrible headache the Friday before I got tested, and was struggling to sleep the whole weekend. I was feeling stuffy and more fatigued, but I thought that it was just the snow. I always get sick when the weather flip-flops from hot to cold. If you’re from New York, you know we have 10000000 different seasons in one day! So catching a cold is not a rare sighting during this season. But one thing I did feel that was wiping me OUT was the loss of smell and nasal pain. It was like my nose was just dry and almost naked, with my nerve endings exposed. It was a desert. It felt so exposed, but also so useless at the same time. It was a painful paradox. I am grateful I didn’t lose my taste though! Because that would have been so depressing. But it was still so peculiar not being able to smell anything. I am still clearing out all the mucus in my chest and throat but it’s clearing up day-by-day. Two more days and I will get retested for work in-person clearance. I’ve definitely enjoyed the time at home, but I do miss being at work and look forward to being at the office again.

If this has taught me anything, it’s to stop playing with my health. A lot of people I know from different areas of the state tested positive around the same time that I did, so I knew that we were all affected by a wave. Regardless, it definitely scared me into taking care of myself. I am sad that it took for this for me to finally put my health first; nonetheless, MESSAGE RECEIVED and actions taken! Plus I now have first hand experience and antibodies! And I am grateful to be recovering fully, by the grace of God and support of my soul tribe.

What I Used to Heal & Build Up My Immune System:

My friends and family all had great suggestions for building up my immune system and health. I used some of the following methods that really helped and wanted to share with anyone afflicted looking for more holistic methods of healing. I do urge you to please do your research and make sure these remedies don’t interfere with any allergies or preexisting medical conditions, if you do want to try them.

– Sleep, sleep, sleep, sleep, sleep!

– Sea Moss (liquid or powder form)

– Elderberry (berries tea, vitamins, gummy vitamins, syrup)

– Breathe Easy, Throat Coat, Gypsy Cold Care Teas

– Respiratory steam: eucalyptus leaves, mint/eucalyptus oil, fresh sliced citrus fruits (orange, lime, lemon, grapefruit), menthol crystals, cinnamon sticks, and fresh lavender herbs and dried citrus peels. Put all ingredients in a pot in water and let brew until boiling, then turn off flame and remove pot from stove and then steam face at safe distance with towel over head for 15 minutes. (Courtesy of Imani Cohen, @thehoodhealer)

– Fresh soups and WHOLE foods (I cannot stress this enough: eat as healthy as possible! Give your body a chance to build itself up and choose foods that will help your body, and not harm it. Food is medicine! Don’t let medicine become your food. Prevention is always better than cure!)

– Ginger, lemon, honey tea

– Lime, 1 tbsp baking soda, water. Boil and then drink every 30 mins until finished with pot.

– Fresh ginger root, lemon, garlic, and onion. Place all chopped ingredients in pot and boil. Once boiling, turn off flame and drink just the tea every 30 mins until finished with pot.

I am praying for all people affected by this virus. Last year in April, my family experienced the devastating loss of my aunt Rosibel, due to COVID. I miss my aunt so much. 💔 The (1) one-year anniversary of her transition is coming up soon and it’s just not the same without her. 🤍 I’m so grateful for the time we had, and pray for her immediate family, that God allows them to feel her presence ALWAYS, as they are comforted by the Spirit. 🙏🏽🤍 I pray for all families that are reflecting on the scary and traumatizing times we faced (1) one year ago at the start of this pandemic. It’s so mind-boggling to me that it’s almost 1 year from when we shut down as a country and nation and faced a pandemic together. A year later, and we are still being affected. Stay safe, healthy, and mentally strong. Hold close to your loved ones, and remember to always put your health first!

I’m so grateful for surviving this experience, and even more grateful for recovery and healing. Happy March, my beautiful readers!

Love eternally, Daniposa.